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The Good Dwarf Guide: Series II

This series is similar in style to the first series: these two series are much more like each other than they are like any series following. Pace is still reasonably leisurely, and special effects and costume changes are limited. As in the first series, Grant Naylor's contribution is restricted to writing: Ed Bye once again produces and directs.

Although the first and second series have numerous similarities, there are also important points of difference. The set budget seems to have been given at least a minor shot in the arm, for one thing, so they can move away from bottle shows set solely in the sleeping quarters, rec room and corridors, and there's enough money there for the odd location shoot ("Better Than Life"). In this series we see the first of Kryten and the last of Norman Lovett as Holly, and we hear the name "Ace" for the first time.

Rimmer and Lister get on better in this series than they did in the first, and this opens up more possibilities for the writers beyond the state of armed hostilities we saw previously. It's a very important series for Rimmer: the demons torturing his soul are explored in depth, which makes us simultaneously pity him and squirm. Chris Barrie's got Rimmer's character nailed now, and he's a joy to watch. There are quite a few plot developments for Lister in this series: he finds out he's going to marry Kochanski, he has sex with himself, and he gets pregnant. The consequences of this stuff are short-lived, however, as this plotline is tossed overboard in the next series. Lister's character develops new depths in this series: he's turning into a Really Nice Guy, as his compassion for Rimmer and Kryten's situations shows. The Cat has less to do in this series than in the first, although he gets a star turn in "Parallel Universe".

Despite the lack of special effects bells and whistles, this is an excellent series which is particularly notable for its terrific character development.

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UK: buy video at Amazon   UK: buy video at Sendit   US: buy video at Amazon

UK: buy video at Amazon   UK: buy video at Sendit   US: buy video at Amazon

UK: buy video at Amazon   UK: buy video at Sendit   US: buy video at Amazon

UK: buy video at Amazon   UK: buy video at Sendit   US: buy video at Amazon

UK: buy video at Amazon   UK: buy video at Sendit   US: buy video at Amazon

  Series II DVD

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  Series I & II DVD Pack

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  Just The Shows (Series I-IV DVD)

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  Complete Remastered Series I-III (Video)

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SYNOPSIS: Holly picks up a distress signal from an android named Kryten: he is looking after three female crew members. The boys get all spiffed up to investigate, but discover the three women are a little on the bony side. Kryten accompanies the crew back to the Dwarf and Rimmer puts him to work, until Lister manages to break Kryten out of his programming with the aid of James Dean movies.

COMMENT: This is a great episode. It's full of terrific bits, like the "Neighbours" spoof complete with atrociously mangled Aussie accents, the Esperanto scene, the dog's milk, and the "don't call me Rimmer" sequence. The Cat doesn't get a lot to do, but has a great moment at the mirror and some very appealing lines about why cats don't chase sticks. The episode would be a brilliant one if Kryten weren't a little too C3PO-ish for comfort, a problem that was fixed with the advent of the rejigged Kryten in "Backwards".

The addition of some new sets also cheers the environment up a bit: we get off the Dwarf for the first time, seeing an exterior shot of the crashed Nova 5, and the Dwarf sets are also a little easier on the eyes than in the first series, with not quite so much wall-to-wall military, or possibly ocean, grey.

Chris Barrie really hits his stride here as Rimmer: he now seems completely comfortable with the character. The nature of his relationship with Lister changes slightly, as it's a touch more cordial than the total open warfare of the first series, which would have been difficult to sustain over a long period. It's not as friendly as all that, though, and Holly proves how wise he was in picking Rimmer to be brought back when Lister says to Kryten: "Driving Rimmer nuts is what keeps me going".

THE BEST BIT: Once again a tough call, but it's got to be Lister's "my mate Ace is incredibly incredibly brave" bit, just because of the future echoes. The dog's milk, though, is also a classic.

THE WORST BIT: Kryten, by a country mile. This guy is so unfunny it's embarrassing. With Robert Llewellyn in this role, this episode would have been dangerous.

IMMORTAL DIALOGUE: "As the days go by, we face the increasing inevitability that we are alone in a Godless, uninhabited, hostile and meaningless universe. Still, you've got to laugh, haven't you."

"Aliens used our bog roll?"

"How did you know my nickname was Bonehead?" "I was only guessing."


Playing your ace: This episode is, of course, historic for the first mention of Ace, which Grant Naylor picked up and ran with (at light speed) in "Dimension Jump". It's an island of continuity in the sea of inconsistency which usually characterises Red Dwarf.

We knew him when: That's Tony Slattery cunningly disguised as an android in "Androids".

There it is again, only more so: The return of Rimmer's white uniform, this time prettied up with some rather fetching touches of gold lamé about the collar, gold braid up to the elbows and gold epaulets. The BBC were environmentally sensitive recyclers long before it was fashionable to be green.

A broken man: Lister succeeds in breaking Kryten's programming by the end of the episode; however, this has to be done again at the beginning of "Backwards". Perhaps the programming was restored by Lister's repair. There's a nice semi-link here between Kryten's US James Dean accent and the Canadian accent Robert Llewellyn later adopts.

In the groove: The Esperanto programme was a Channel 27 production: this links with Rimmer and Lister's discussion of "groovy, funky Channel 27" in "Future Echoes" and the footage of the Channel 27 news broadcast in "Better Than Life".

Rough around the edges: Kryten's mask here is much less technically sophisticated than the one Robert Llewellyn wears: the ears aren't very smooth, and instead of the professional-looking grates over the ears, there are just a couple of holes.

It's highbrow stuff, this, y'know: Grant Naylor inject a touch of culture, calling one of the dead Nova 5 crew "Jane Air".

The unbearable lightness of being: Although Rimmer's composed entirely of light, he manages to perceive the odour of Lister's moon boots. Given that the smell could no doubt drill through tempered steel, it's probably understandable.



SYNOPSIS: A post pod catches up with the Dwarf, bringing mail from Earth. Rimmer discovers his father is dead. The mail includes a total immersion video game called "Better Than Life", which detects the players' desires and fantasies and makes them come true. Rimmer, Lister and the Cat try the game: the Cat gets all the fish he can reel in and a Marilyn Monroe lookalike hot for him, while Lister gets a guitar-shaped waterbed and caviar Vindaloo. Things seem to be working out well for Rimmer, too: he gets a promotion to Admiral and has wild sex with Yvonne McGruder in an E-Type. However, things soon start going wrong: Ms McGruder ends up pregnant, with seven screaming brats, and the E-Type has to be sold as it's not practical for a family. Things go from bad to worse as the taxman catches up with Rimmer and he turns into a drunken bum: his self-loathing goes so deep he can't allow nice things to happen to him even in fantasy. The boys manage to extract themselves from the game just as Rimmer has everyone buried in sand and about to be eaten by ants. But after the good news that Rimmer did actually pass an exam after all, they discover they're still in the game, which ends for real as the taxman's hammer falls on Rimmer's hapless fingers.

COMMENT: This is the strangest episode of Red Dwarf ever made. The tone veers so wildly from comedy to tragedy that it leaves you feeling very unsettled. You come too close to the rawness of Rimmer's psyche, and the darkness of this overshadows the humour. While parts of it are amusing, I couldn't actually label this episode as a comedy at all: it's too tragic even to qualify as black comedy. None of this means that the episode is a failure: far from it.

Having confused the hell out of the audience by evoking unabashed compassion for Rimmer, Grant Naylor then play with your brain still more by making his behaviour in the video game so smeggy that pity turns to disgust, then yanking on your heartstrings again as the depth of Rimmer's problems becomes clear. You can't like him, but you've got to feel something for a man who can't let anything nice happen to him even in his fantasies.

Grant Naylor cloud the picture still more by making Rimmer genuinely apologetic for visiting his problems on the rest of the crew during the game - the first time we've ever seen Rimmer care about anyone else's feelings whatsoever. You're caught between your sympathy for Rimmer's problems and your natural revulsion for his personality, and you feel at the end as if you've just staggered off a rollercoaster.

Lister in this one again shows his colours as a genuinely nice guy - he's obviously sorry for Rimmer after hearing the story of Rimmer's parents, and is concerned enough about him to press him to play the total immersion video game. Lister's attitude is nicely contrasted with the Cat's characteristic feline self-absorption.

THE BEST BIT: The Rimmer stuff.

THE WORST BIT: The Rimmer stuff.

IMMORTAL DIALOGUE: "Is that all she says?" "Just that he passed away peacefully in his Jeep."

"You should take a look at my wardrobe! It's so big it crosses an international time zone!"


Let me out of here: The BBC go wild 'n' crazy with the budget, and we see our first location shoot in this episode.

Did you say golf?: So Lister and the Cat's idea of paradise is playing golf? Huh? Lister doesn't look like the golfing type, and the Cat even less so. Maybe the shooting budget only stretched as far as the nearest golf course - I can't think of a single other plausible reason for this very odd plot point. And what was that Marilyn Monroe stuff all about? Seemed singularly pointless to me - it didn't actually go anywhere. Rimmer gets Yvonne McGruder in this ep, and the Cat mentions his girlfriend Miranda, but poor old Lister remains dateless despite his guitar-shaped waterbed. No, he prefers golf. Yeah, right. On the other hand, we know he's partial to golf courses.....

Dropping your aitches: Rimmer's "H" disappears while in the game, as he's not a hologram while he's playing. In the scene where they rip the headsets off, Rimmer still isn't wearing an "H", but the "H" appears in the following scene when he walks through the doorway into the sleeping quarters. Rimmer's still in the game at this point, and he can be touched, as the taxman's hammer demonstrates, so what's he doing with an "H" at all?

You know, like before: There's some nice continuity work in this episode - the idea of the skutters being Western fans is taken a little further (with very cute results), and they show a hologram reading the news on Channel 27, which Lister and Rimmer discussed in an earlier episode.

Put up your dukes, or something: Yvonne McGruder looked a lot more attractive than expected, dontcha think? Particularly given Rimmer's description of her in the next ep as the ship's boxing champion. We have to remember the concussion factor, though.

There it goes again: And Rimmer's white uniform racks up yet more frequent-costume miles.

That explains a lot: We discover here for the first time that the "J" in Rimmer's name stands for "Judas".

Red Dwarf, Deep Space, The Universe: The skutters' letter shows Red Dwarf's postal code to be RE1 3DW, which is pretty cute.

Lickety split: The Cat licks the waiter in the TIV game, and says he always licks whoever gives him food. But he doesn't do this at any other time, and besides, it's not a behaviour associated with cats.

Dictator of the month club: Rimmer's obsession with things military gets its first airing here with his hero worship of Bonaparte. The military thing gets a lot of mileage as the series roll on, and reaches its height in "Meltdown".

And on this historic day: When the Cat is saying that having Rimmer's father tell him he's a smeghead is his fantasy, he deliberately does his "It's mine!" line direct to camera, in one of only two instances of this in the whole of Red Dwarf. (The other instance is from the Cat again in 'Parallel Universe".)



SYNOPSIS: Lister, Rimmer and the Cat find a planet with an atmosphere and celebrate the anniversary of Rimmer's death. Rimmer drunkenly confesses he's only ever had sex once, and that he yearns to have loved and been loved. When they wake, they find four days and the black box missing, Lister's and the Cat's legs broken, and Lister's jigsaw completed. They find the black box and piece together the story: Lister, feeling sorry for Rimmer, had decided to give him one of his old girlfriends, Lise Yates, in the form of a memory implant. Things went wrong, with Rimmer realising his memories of Lise were a fake, and Rimmer had asked for his old memory back and for all traces of the incident to be wiped. Lister and the Cat's legs were broken when they dropped a gravestone on their feet on the way to burying the black box.

COMMENT: This is another full-on pathos episode, especially coming hard on the heels of "Better Than Life". Grant Naylor play ruthlessly on our sympathies, as it's impossible not to feel sorry for Rimmer here. The tragedy of Rimmer's story is real, but Grant Naylor don't allow the thing to become bogged down in mawkishness: after Rimmer's stunningly sad line about how he would have given everything up to have loved and been loved, the sadness is neatly undercut by Rimmer's offkey rendition of "Someone To Watch Over Me". This really is brilliant writing.

The episode also underlines the change in the relationship between Lister and Rimmer: Lister's genuine sadness about the lack of love in Rimmer's past and his gift of memory show that the relationship is far less hostile than previously. As well, the "deathday" celebration shows that the crew are now capable of rubbing along together without constantly trying to strangle each other. The episode's also a great whodunnit, intriguingly plotted: you half expect Poirot to emerge from the shadows twiddling his moustache.

There are some nice touches in this one: seeing the crew on the surface of the planet makes a welcome change, and there's some hilarious model work with the Blue Midget which gently sends up the Thunderbirds genre without resorting to direct parody. It's all in the details: the Blue Midget has a bumper sticker reading "My other spaceship is a Red Dwarf", and then there are the fluffy dice, which seem strangely similar to the ones in Rimmer's E-Type in "Better Than Life". Lister's putting in the final piece of the jigsaw which then is transformed into the credits is also a fun touch.

THE BEST BIT: Rimmer eating the triple fried egg chilli sauce and chutney sandwich. (Try one, they're fantastic.)

THE WORST BIT: Why, why, why the air guitar bit at the beginning? Not so much bad as pointless and faintly embarrassing. And Holly was really stretching for that gynaecologist joke.

IMMORTAL DIALOGUE: "I wouldn't like to be around when one of these suckers is making a speech!"


Brief encounter: What is this obsession Grant Naylor have with showing Rimmer in his underwear? Fortunately for us all, they get over it from series III on.

Keep the day job II: Rimmer sings "Someone to Watch Over Me" in his dream horribly, awfully, painfully flat. He should have been booked for assault with a deadly weapon. This is clearly Rimmer's, not Chris Barrie's, problem, as Chris shows in his "black card" trill in "Balance of Power", his "If I Were a Rich Man" bit in "Timeslides" and in "Tongue Tied" that he can sing in tune.

Welcome to the tragedy suite: After what happened in the last ep, I blenched when they put up the establishing shot of the observation deck in this one. Angst city! I'm just too sensitive a flower for this heartrending stuff.

To bee or not to bee: It seems implied in this episode that Rimmer cannot leave the ship without being contained in a projection cage. This conflicts with the later explanation that Rimmer is projected by a light bee.

But I got ten out of ten in the theory exam: When Lister tells the Cat behind Rimmer's back that Rimmer has only had sex once, the Cat laughs incredulously in a feline-of-the-world manner. Yet in "Stasis Leak" the Cat says "I've never been this close to women before!".

He must have repressed it: Rimmer asks Lister if he knows how many times Rimmer's made love, and Lister says no. Yet all of that was discussed previously in "Confidence and Paranoia" and "Me2".



SYNOPSIS: The boys discover a stasis leak on board which allows them to go back in time. Rimmer attempts to convince his earlier self to go into stasis and so survive, but the Rimmer in the past thinks he's hallucinating. Lister finds a wedding photograph of himself and Kochanski, and finds on going back that they do get married, but five years in the future when he finds another way to get back to the past.

COMMENT: Grant Naylor are as nuts on time travel stories as the Star Trek writers: they haven't had Red Dwarf slingshotting round the sun yet, but it's only a matter of time. Personally, I find them pretty dull, so I rate this as only a very average ep.

There are logistical holes in the plot you could drive a truck through, but why bother? But I can't refrain from pointing out that it seems rather odd that once Lister finds out he will be achieving his dream in five years, that he never refers to it again and neither does anyone else.

There's a return to the status quo ante for Rimmer in this episode: after the last two tearjerkers, they pull Rimmer back to his more smeggish persona with the lemming story, which undercuts the sympathy that had been building up. I don't know whether this emotional seesawing was carefully orchestrated, or whether alternatively Grant Naylor didn't really have a firm idea of which direction they were headed with Rimmer. I doubt that they knew themselves, which would account for the inconsistencies in tone.

THE BEST BIT: The Cat's "What is it?" sequence, and Lister's rant about natural yoghurt eaters outside the honeymoon suite.

THE WORST BIT: Maybe it's just my aversion to time travel stories, but I found the ending with the multiple characters very weak. Look, why don't we just forget the whole thing?

IMMORTAL DIALOGUE: "You can't walk round a mining ship looking like a finalist from 'Come Jiving'."


What calendar are you using?: Grant Naylor play fast and loose with dates and times in Red Dwarf, depending on what suits them at the time. The date given here is Wednesday 2 March 2077: this date conflicts with the references from series III on to the twenty-third century, and also conflicts with the dates given in Rimmer's diary in "Me2".

A driving urge: Why didn't Lister just go back and ask someone to check the work on the drive plate?

The cheque's in the mail: The luggage scene in the hotel seems to owe a rather large debt to the work of Terry Pratchett.

What's that thing doing in here?: Lister's eye catches the camera while he is finishing the line "You can't walk round a mining ship looking like a finalist from 'Come Jiving'".

Hologram physiology (advanced): Rimmer's passing through the table seems to knock the light bee theory on the head, although perhaps the bee was in the bit of him still under the table. He also disappears when under the table when he should be visible.



SYNOPSIS:Holly appears to be having problems, and Queeg 500, Red Dwarf's backup computer, appears, takes Holly offline and gives him nightwatchman's duties. The crew are initially happy with Queeg, but when he turns out to be a martinet who makes Lister and the Cat work for food and makes Rimmer exercise till his ears bleed, they're not so sure. Holly challenges Queeg to a chess duel, loses, and is erased - then returns to tell the crew they've been had.

COMMENT: This episode definitely belongs to Holly. Norman Lovett quit as Holly at the end of this series, and "Queeg" is his masterwork. Lovett is great all the way through, from his forgetful beginning ("or was it the yellow plug?"), to his lurking in the corridors as the nightwatchman, to the chess duel ("king prawn takes horsie"), to the denouement. It's a nice ep, not outstanding but fun, that shows how terrific a character Holly can be when well-used.. I don't have to tell you why the guy's called "Queeg", do I? Nah, didn't think so.

"Queeg" is another in a long line of episodes that depends for its impact on the intersection of brilliant writing and excellent acting. The script's great, and none of the cast put a foot wrong in extracting the maximum from it. Charles Augins has a terrific turn as the forbidding guest star Queeg.

Although this is a Holly episode, we nonetheless get the chance to peer a bit more closely into Rimmer's twisted psyche. We find that he learned not to trust anyone following the Porky Roebuck barbecue sauce incident, and we learn from his draughts match with the skutter that he's got the ethics of a crocodile.

This is a stunt-heavy episode for this series, with Lister falling out of his bunk onto the floor and diving through an explosion. Who'd be Craig Charles' health insurer?

THE BEST BIT: There are several contenders, including Rimmer's forced exercises, but the honours go to Holly and his "jape of the century" speech, not to mention his touching rendition of "I'll Say Goodbye to Love".

THE WORST BIT: Rimmer's disappearing legs. I might have laughed when I was eleven.

IMMORTAL DIALOGUE: "You are a total, total - a word has yet to be invented to describe how totally whatever it is you are, but you are one, and a total, total one at that."


And now, ladies and gentlemen: The malfunctions in the hologram projection suite seem to have been stuck in to give Chris Barrie a chance to show off his talent for impersonation, and a good thing, too. It's uncanny how perfect his imitations are - if the acting ever dries up, he has a great career ahead of him in fraud.

It's called homage, not plagiarism: Holly's line "This is mutiny, Mr Queeg. I'll see you swing from the highest yardarm in Titan docking port for this day's work" is a direct lift from "Mutiny On The Bounty". (Except for the bit about Titan, that is.) Then there's "The Caine Mutiny", of course. There's also a Western reference, with "Do Not Forsake Me, Oh, My Darling" from "High Noon" playing as Holly fronts up for the duel, and the "A computer's gotta do..." bit. "High Noon" got another workout in "Future Echoes", where Lister whistles "My Darling Clementine".



SYNOPSIS: Holly invents the "Holly Hop Drive" (what a megastupid name), which he believes will be able to take the Red Dwarf back to Earth. However, when they activate the highly technical start button, the crew find themselves instead in (surprise!) a parallel universe. My God, these episode names are masterpieces of creativity. Rimmer and Lister discover that their counterparts in the parallel universe are women, while the Cat discovers that his is a dog. Rimmer successfully repels the advances of his counterpart, but Lister and his counterpart after getting completely blitzed make a night of it. The morning after, Lister discovers it's men who get pregnant in this universe, and realises that that's how he will get the twin boys spotted in "Future Echoes".

COMMENT: This episode was clearly setting up a storyline for the next series which was later abandoned.

Any episode that contained "Tongue Tied" would automatically get a great rating from me, and the rest of the ep's pretty good too. I do have some quibbles, though: obviously it was important for the (then) plot that Lister get to sleep with his counterpart, and that meant that for the sake of comedy Rimmer couldn't also. But that sets up a totally unrealistic situation - are we seriously expected to believe that Rimmer would be put off by a woman wanting him for his body? Rimmer? He didn't kick Yvonne McGruder out of bed, after all, and she was calling him by somebody else's name!

There's also some very obvious role reversal stuff which is pretty tiresome: you'd have to be a Neanderthal to find any of it novel. Deb Lister is a pretty exact equivalent for Dave, although her unconcern when Dave realises he might be pregnant would be uncharacteristic of the sweet, caring guy we know and love. But I found Arlene Rimmer much less smeggy than Arnold, probably as I couldn't stop cheering as she treated Arnold like the cheap two-bit trash he is.

This episode gives us some more insights into Rimmer's attitude to women, and God, are they hideous. By watching Arlene in operation, we get a glimpse of what Arnold must be like when he's on the pull with a few drinks inside him, and it's enough to send you screaming into the night.

THE BEST BIT: Serious competition for this award: in fact, it's just about impossible to settle on any one part. It goes without saying that "Tongue Tied" is way up there, but Rimmer's artificial nose story and his How To Chat Up Girls Through Hypnosis And Dopey Opening Lines routine are also screamingly funny. And the Arlene/Arnold scenes are pure classics.

THE WORST BIT: The dog. Yep, he was an amusing contrast to the Cat, but I'm a cat girl myself, so I just didn't like him.

IMMORTAL DIALOGUE: "You're disgusting! You're only after me for one thing!" "Why? How many have you got?"

"If you want to keep your beer cool, stick it between his legs."


Wha?!: What alternate dimension did "Tongue Tied" blast out of? The answer, of course, is that just as Chris Barrie got a chance to show off his voices in the previous episode, this is Danny John-Jules's turn to take the spotlight. Danny does a terrific job, the others manage not to fall flat on their faces and sensibly keep out of his way, and I have to pick myself up off the floor from laughing every time. A vastly entertaining time was obviously had by all (except for Craig Charles, who looks distinctly anxious at times) and the guys even get nice new red costumes, which must have been a welcome novelty by this stage. And Danny gets another chance to strut his funky stuff at the disco, this time on speed.

Now let's see him juggle: After his guest star turn as Queeg, Charles Augins demonstrates his versatility here by doing the "Tongue Tied" choreography.

Two for the price of one: In the best BBC recycling tradition, Howard Goodall reuses the tune to "Tongue Tied" as an instrumental number in the disco, and the Cat wears his "Tongue Tied" costume when he goes over to the alternate Red Dwarf. And to complete the triple, the scene in which the boys emerge into the alternate Red Dwarf takes place in a redress of the stasis booth set.

Peepholeing Tom: For the second time (the first was in "Better Than Life"), Rimmer's interest in lingerie of questionable taste comes to the fore. Frankly, this is more than I ever wanted to know about Rimmer, but Grant Naylor have an incredible knack of picking on little details that remind you vividly about Rimmer's innate smeggishness in all its glory.

Warning: this clothing may seriously endanger your eyesight: Rimmer is, of course, a prince among dorks, but it has to be said that in his cycling outfit he outdoes himself.

A trick of the light: In another intriguing glimpse into hologram physiology, in the scene where Holly is explaining the Holly Hop Drive, we see Rimmer scratching his shoulder.

And on this historic day - the return: The Cat speaks the lines: "I don't know what that is, but I'm sure he wants to eat me" and "Better make myself look big" direct to camera.

I can't get no satisfaction: Lister finally gets to have sex in this episode, but all the romance is off-camera. Rimmer gets Arlene's tongue down his ear, which must have been more fun than a Johnson's baby bud. Or not.


Reviews By Gavrielle Homepage Stephen Donaldson's Gap Series Review Stephen Donaldson's Mysteries Review Red Dwarf Episode Guide by Gavrielle Perry Reviews By Gavrielle Links Contact Gavrielle